All This Time
by luvin-benadam
Summary: It's been nearly five year since Lucas left Tree Hill and never looked back. Until now when he returns unannounced and realizes just what a secret Brooke has been keeping from him in his absence.
1. Chapter 1

Of all of the things in Brooke Davis' life that made her who she was, the most defining of them all was sleeping right in front of her. She used to believe that a person was made up of all of their experiences in their lifetime, but that was until she became a mother. Because for Brooke Davis, becoming a mother had made her realize that, until then, she hadn't been experiencing anything at all.

As she gazed in wonder at the little head cradled into her chest, she felt nothing but love and adoration for her child, despite the act she put on earlier to scold the little girl for being impolite. It caused her great pain to punish her child but Brooke did not want to be the type of mother she had had growing up, too unloved for rules, because rules showed care. Something that Brooke had learned much later in life.

The little head stirred in sleep against her and Brooke placed a kiss into the downy hair, shifting slightly until the child's weight was balanced in her arms, and carried her into her own room, tucking the little body under the covers and backing slowly from the room. She left the door just slightly ajar as she did every night, the crack of light from the hall beyond casting a beam of light that illuminated the face of the sleeping child.

Brooke sighed in relief. The nightmares that had plagued her child over the past fortnight had meant that Brooke had gotten no sleep as well. Concern devoured her. Ella had never been a child disturbed by nightmares. She had been sleeping through the night since she was four months old. But the past couple weeks she had awoken Brooke, screaming in terror until her mother climbed into bed with her and rocked her back into a restless slumber.

Brooke picked up the phone from its cradle and dialled the familiar number until the other woman answered the phone without so much as a hello.

"She's finally asleep?" Haley asked.

"Finally," Brooke sighed. "I don't know how long she'll be out this time for though."

Haley could feel the palpable tension in her friend even through the phone. "I'm sure it's just a phase," she reassured.

"I'm hoping."

"Did you finish your sketches and send them in?" Haley asked, ever the concerned mother to even those who weren't her children.

"Yes," Brooke replied. "Thanks again for taking Ella this afternoon. You're a life saver."

"Oh no problem. Jamie loved the company."

"I think I'm going to head to bed now, too," Brooke said. "Try and catch some sleep in case Ella wakes up during the night."

"Good idea," her friend replied. "Still on for tomorrow?"

"It's a date," Brooke said. "The only one I've had in awhile actually," she added light-heartedly as an afterthought.

Haley laughed. "I'll see you tomorrow at four."

OTHOTHOTH

"Ella, we're late!" Brooke called up the stairs.

"Coming, Mommy!" Replied the almost four year old. Brooke could hear her little feet running circles across the carpeted stairs above her until at last she appeared at the top, dressed in little leggings and a long top, ever so concerned about her choice in outfit.

She had long ago stopped allowing her mother to pick her outfits, refusing only to wear something if it was by her own volition. Which suited Brooke just fine since her very stylish daughter had definitely inherited her sense in fashion. While her personality was very much her mother, Ella's looks were mostly her father. Dark blonde hair in beachy waves down her back, big, expression filled blue eyes. Except her dimples, puckered into the corner of each cheek. Those were all her mother.

"I'm ready now," she said with a grin as she reached the bottom of the stairs.

Brooke grabbed her navy peacoat and bent to put it on her little body, kissing Ella's forehead in the process.

"Yes you are, munchkin. Now let's go see your cousin Jamie."

There was no protest from the small child who instinctively took her mother's hand and followed her with the trust only a child shows for their mother out of the house and to Nathan and Haley's a short distance away.

They were waiting, as they always were, on the porch of their family home. Jamie jumping up and down excitedly as he waved at Ella from his spot by the door, begging permission to go running to the driveway to meet them. Nathan gave the nod of permission and Jamie came flying across the lawn towards them.

"Where's mine, little man?" Brooke asked in fake hurt after Jamie hugged Ella.

"Hi Auntie Brooke," he said sheepishly and walked into her embrace.

She savoured the feeling of his little body safe in her arms and remembered a time, not too long ago, when she held him for the first time, resting his tiny body on her own giant baby bump, terrified that very shortly she would have one of her own just like this.

"Come on!" Jamie said, pulling her from her distant thoughts. "I want to show Ella my new toy!"

The two children ran with enthusiasm back towards the house and inside without another word to the adults, leaving them laughing and shaking their heads in their wake. Brooke slowly made her way up the porch to Haley and Nathan.

"How'd she sleep last night?" Haley asked, concerned.

"Don't ask," Brooke replied.

Haley rubbed her arm and led her inside to the kitchen. Nathan took her coat and kissed her cheek in hello and sauntered off to check on the children.

"You okay Brooke?"

"It's almost Ella's birthday." It was enough of a response that Haley understood the implications.

"You wish he was here for it."

"I wish he was here for all of it," Brooke replied. "Not just her birthday. Her life. She's asking so many questions now. Why Jamie has a dad and she doesn't."

Haley felt tears spring to her eyes and cursed the man she used to call her best friend.

"Lucas would adore her if he knew her." It was hardly a consolation.

"But he doesn't," Brooke replied. "He made damn sure to never look back the moment he left with Peyton."

"Have you considered looking for him again?"

Brooke shook her head. "I stopped looking for that man a long time ago. If he thought anything here was worth missing, he would have checked in a long time ago. It's been nearly five years since anyone's heard from him."

Haley sighed, debating on how much the truth she was withholding would hurt her best friend.

"Actually," she begin tentatively.

Brooke's head snapped up from her chest. "You've heard from him?"

Haley nodded slowly. "Well, not me personally. He called Nathan a couple days ago."

Brooke was speechless. She wondered what had been the catalyst that had made Lucas Scott make contact for the first time in five years.

"What did he want?" She asked.

"He said he was just checking in. Wanted to know how everyone was doing."

Brooke nodded slowly, mind reeling with the possibilities of this new revelation.

"I didn't know if I should tell you or not," Haley said.

"No, no, it's okay. I can handle it, Hales."

"I know you can Brooke. You're one of the strongest women I know. But this is Lucas we're talking about here. He's always been a bit of a touchy subject."

Brooke nodded her head and her attention was diverted with the return of Nathan and the two kids.

"Mommy, Mommy, look at what Jamie has!" Ella exclaimed excitedly as she showed Brooke his new toy.

"Woah!" Brooke exclaimed. "That's pretty cool!"

Ella opened her mouth to explain what it did but was distracted at the sound of the doorbell ringing. Brooke's heart stopped.

"I'll get it!" Jamie cried as he sprang to the door.

"Me too!" Ella cried and shot off after him.

The two children pulled the heavy door open and gazed up into the face of the tall man standing before them, both calling "Hi," in symmetry before the adults stepped in to see who was there.

OTHOTHOTH

** So this is my first OTH fanfic. Please please please please pleeeeeease leave a review! It means so much to a writer. I'm hoping you guys enjoy this story because I'm loving writing it!**


	2. Chapter 2

Brooke pushed herself off the kitchen stool and walked to the front door and the man standing on the threshold with a smile.

"We've been waiting for you," she exclaimed, walking into the arms he held open for her and nuzzling her face into his shoulder.

"Sorry I'm late," Jake replied. "Someone here refused to leave the house until she found her new shirt." Jake's finger poked into the shoulder of the girl next to him and she grinned sheepishly in response.

"Come here you," Brooke said, folding the girl into her arms. "I missed you! You and your dad are never allowed to go on vacation again, you understand me?" She said sarcastically.

Jenny laughed. "Don't worry Auntie Brooke, we missed you too." She extracted herself from Brooke's grip and found the faces she was looking for, Jamie and Ella, waiting impatiently for her to say her hello's so she could run off and play with them.

Brooke linked her arm through Jake's and they walked back to the kitchen with Nathan and Haley. "No, I'm serious though," Brooke said. "You are never allowed to leave again. Ella drove me crazy asking me every day when Jenny and you were coming home."

Jake blushed. "I told you, you should have come with us!"

Brooke shook her head. "Too much work to do. I just couldn't make it happen."

"I know," Jake said. "We had a good time but we're glad to be home."

"And we are all glad you're home," Brooke said and Haley and Nathan nodded in response.

The foursome grabbed drinks from the kitchen and headed into the living room while the kids ran off to play, their shrieks of laughter echoing down the halls.

"So Nate, what did Lucas want?" Brooke asked.

"Lucas?" The surprise in Jake's tone was unmissable.

"Yeah," Nathan replied. "He called a couple days ago."

"Wow." It was the only word Jake could come up with to mask his surprise.

"Tell me about it. He said he was just checking it, wanted to know how everyone was doing. He didn't really say much about what was going on in his life."

"He didn't say where he was or what he had been doing the past five years that he decided to ignore everyone?" Brooke asked, a hint of anger creeping into her voice.

"Sorry, Brooke. Nothing like that. It was a pretty short conversation," Nathan said.

Silence fell through the room. Jake sighed. He knew what the implications of that phone call meant for Brooke and he worried for her. Worried how it might affect her, worried that she would take it too hard. It had only been a phone call but for Brooke it was so much more. It was the reminder that somewhere out there was a man who had a daughter he didn't know about because he took off with her mother's best friend.

"You okay?" He asked her.

She nodded but a slow blush of anxiety had crept it's way up her cheeks. She was worried, too.

"Can we please talk about something else" Brooke asked and everyone nodded a silent agreement in relief.

"Tell us all about your vacation, Jake!" Haley suggested.

OTHOTHOTH

It was late by the time everyone was ready to head home, much past Ella and Jenny's bedtimes, so somewhere along the way the suggestion was made the Jake and Jenny just spend the night at Brooke's as opposed to driving the ways back to their own home. It wasn't the first time, in fact Jake and Jenny spent a vast majority of their time at Brooke and Ella's.

Over the years a certain bond had cemented without anyone's intention or knowledge of it. Jake was the single father of a motherless daughter. Brooke was the mother of a fatherless little girl. They begun hanging out, bonded over their similar situations. Their daughter's were like glue, best friends in their childish manors, just four years apart in age. Jenny was like a big sister to Ella and Ella was Jenny's own personal little doll. Brooke was the mother Jenny never had. Jake was the father Ella was deprived of. Along the way they became their own sort of little family, not bonded by blood but a foundation equally as strong.

Jake and Brooke stood at the mouth of the door to Ella's room, peering inside to the two little girls asleep in the same bed. Ella and Jenny refused to have it any other way. They were their girls, the two little ones fast asleep. Neither belonging to one nor the other, but both belonging to each.

Brooke pulled the door towards her until it was almost closed, leaving it open a crack as always, and her and Jake tip-toed back down the stairs to the living room where they sat in exhaustion.

"Where's your head at girly?"

Brooke turned her head to gaze into the face she adored. The face of a man that had been so much more than a friend to her over the past four years but had never asked for more, had never expected it.

"I'm happy, Jake. Ella is happy. She might not have her biological father but she has you. She adores you. I think somewhere along that line I convinced myself that I would never hear from him again, that he would just disappear and never be a part of my life again. But now, with him calling Nathan, it's like everything has just come right back to the surface again."

Jake stroked her arm soothingly. "Do you miss him?" There was no envy in his voice.

"For myself, no. But for Ella, definitely. I decided that when I had kids I would be in love, married, and my baby would grow up with two loving parents. Never in my life did I imagine that I would be raising my daughter without a father. That he wouldn't even know of her existence because he ran away." She fought the tears that threatened to choke her.

Jake pulled her in for a hug and ran his fingers through her hair. "I know this is hard for you, Brooke. I know that you want him in Ella's life."

The tears subsided and Brooke pulled away to gaze into the face she found so much comfort in.

"She has you, Jake. And honestly I don't think we could ask for anything better."

He smiled, his heart warming.

"How about we go to bed?" He suggested.

Brooke smiled and nodded and they walked up the stairs together, into her room despite the readily available guest room, and crawled into her bed together, just as they had done a thousand times before.

It was the first night Ella slept through the night in weeks.

**Okay so just in case there's any confusion here is the deal: Brooke and Jake are not together. They've just bonded over being single parents and are very very close because of it. Coming up will be Brooke's job and what she does for work, also the history behind what happened with her and Lucas that made him leave. **

**And very soon Lucas and Peyton will be making their re-entrance to Tree Hill! I hope you all review and I'm looking forward to writing more for you. **


	3. Chapter 3

Morning dawned cool and brisk as always, a shiver of light sliding its way through the gap in the curtains, casting a beam across the head of the bed. Brooke stirred from her sleep and stretched, reaching to the spot next to her and finding it oddly empty. Confusion knit itself between her eyes. Jake would never leave without saying goodbye. She pushed herself into a sitting position, glanced at the clock on her bedside table and balked. It was 10:30. Ella was an early riser; Brooke hadn't slept in this late in so long she couldn't remember.

A smile crept onto her face. She felt well rested and relaxed. Ella had finally slept through the night, which meant that she had as well, and Jake and Jenny were home. Her family was back together. She pushed herself from the warmth of her bed and crept down the stairs, following the noise in the kitchen until she found them: Jake with his back to her, busily preparing something on the stove, her floral apron wrapped around his taught body. The girls sitting at the island bar, feet swinging from the high stools until Ella caught sight of her.

"Hi sleepy!" She exclaimed.

Brooke grinned at her cheeky child and crossed the gap between them. Pressed a kiss to the top of Ella's head, then Jenny's, then stood beside her girls to watch Jake prepare breakfast.

"Look who decided to get up," he piped in sheepishly with a grin. "We've been making breakfast."

"I can see!" Brooke replied. In front of the girls was a large, empty bowl of waffle batter, the sticky white substance coating the surface of her kitchen counter with little fingerprints. Clearly the girls had been helping.

"What can I do?" She asked, rolling up the sleeves of her shirt and prepared to help.

"You can sit down with the girls at the table and enjoy," he said with a wink.

Brooke couldn't help the smile that reached ear to ear. She helped each of the girls down from their stools and settled them into the breakfast nook, already set with plates and cutlery and syrup, a little in disarray. Ella and Jenny had definitely set it. Jake carried the last of hot waffles from the stove to the table and the four of them sat down for their breakfast.

"You didn't have to do all this," Brooke said as they finished the last of their meal. The girls had already finished and run off to play.

"I wanted to," Jake replied. "Being on vacation was great but Jenny and I missed this. Our breakfasts, our dinners. Two weeks without you guys was too long."

Brooke gave him a half smile, leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Good, because you're not allowed to leave again!"

"We wouldn't dream of it," he said with another wink.

Jake and Jenny spent the day as they always did, hanging out around the house, watching a movie on a rainy day. Brooke felt whole again having them back in the house. She realized that it wasn't an ideal situation, that the girls could get confused, but it worked for them. They were each a stand in for the missing things in the other child's life.

When Haley called and invited them over for dinner last minute they didn't hesitate. Packed the kids into the car, picked up a dessert and wine from the store and headed to their house. They were waiting on the porch as they always were.

Jenny and Ella quickly disappeared to the playroom with Jamie leaving the adults to the kitchen. Brooke pulled the bottle of wine from the bag and pulled four glasses from the cabinet, uncorking the wine and beginning to pour.

"You'll only need three of those," Haley said, pointing to the glasses.

A quippy remark was on the tip of Brooke's tongue when the weight of what Haley said settled into her gut. She glanced up from the glass she was pouring and raised an eyebrow at her friend. Nathan was standing behind her, hand on her shoulder, grin on his face.

"No!" Brooke remarked excitedly. "You have to say it or I won't believe you!" She tried not to jump up and down in excitement.

Haley balled her hands into fists and placed them on the tip of her chin in anticipation of sharing the news. "I'm pregnant!"

Brooke let out a shriek of excitement and closed the gap between them, wrapping as much of both Haley and Nathan into her arms as she could.

"Oh my god!" She cried, literally. When she pulled away from them there were tears streaming down her face.

"Don't cry, Tigger!" Haley said, pulling Brooke back into a hug.

"These are happy tears!" She said with a laugh. She pulled away from Haley's embrace and looked into her face. "I could not possibly be more happy for you guys."

Tears sprung to Haley's eyes, too. "You're making me cry!" She laughed.

Brooke laughed with her and pulled herself together enough to clear her throat. "How far along?"

Jake sat down in the seat next to her after hugging Nathan and giving Haley a congratulatory kiss.

"Only about nine weeks. We just found out. We wanted you guys to be the first to know."

Brooke beamed. "I cannot even begin to tell you how happy I am for you," she gushed.

"Thanks guys," Nathan said.

"Well I would say lets cheers to it but apparently I've lost my drinking buddy," Brooke joked.

"I'll have Coke," Haley laughed.

They poured the drinks into their glasses and raised them, the clinking glass like a chiming bell, welcoming an unborn child into their lives.

OTHOTHOTHOTH

Peyton Sawyer was a lot of things but a mother was not among them. It pained her deeply that she had never been able to have children, especially to not be able to have Lucas' children. He had said that he didn't need them, that he could be happy with her alone, but the years had changed that. The first year that they left Tree Hill had been the happiest. They were finally free from the drama and clutches of all those they left behind, finally free to just be happy. But it hadn't lasted long. Their happiness had been tied into the fact that fate wanted them apart, and finally free from the forces trying to keep them away from each other, the relationship had turned monotonous. Talk of marriage had come up but it somehow never happened. When the couple discovered that Peyton couldn't have children it had caused an irreparable rift. Peyton always felt like she was inadequate, being unable to give Lucas a child. And no matter how many times he told her it didn't matter to him, she never believed him. Eventually he stopped telling her because he didn't believe it himself anymore either.

They had spent the next four years together but not really together. Living in a small apartment of the outskirts of New York city, Lucas had made somewhat of a name for himself as a sports writer, Peyton had stayed at her dead end job working for a record company that hated music.

It was a cold day when he decided that he was going home with or without her. It didn't matter anymore, being together. It hadn't mattered in a long time, really. But he decided to give her the option to come with him for history's sake.

"Home?" She said the word as if it had no meaning anymore.

"There are so many people we left behind," Lucas tried to reason.

"And we left them behind for a reason," Peyton argued.

Lucas shook his head. He was over fighting with her, exhausted by it. It really made no difference to him anymore whether she came back to Tree Hill with him or not.

"I bought you a plane ticket, I'll be on this flight. Maybe I'll see you there." He slung his already packed bag over his shoulder and walked out the front door, not knowing if she'd follow him, not really caring.


	4. Chapter 4

He was almost surprised when she showed up and took the seat next to him. Almost, but not quite. She had never been independent enough to live her life without him, even when he had given her no reason to stay. She had never had the bravery to leave and find a better, happier life for herself, and it was this fact that had taken the surprise out of her action for him. He said nothing as she took her seat, feeling neither happy nor upset that she had joined him. Lucas felt nothing but indifference for Peyton anymore.

When they departed the plane it was to an empty reception. There were no smiling faces waiting to greet them, no friends or family that had missed them terribly in their long and silent absence. The hollow feeling in Lucas' gut intensified as he realized just how many people he had alienated in leaving with Peyton all those years ago. They had no place to go. No family to open their homes and hearts to them, so they got a hotel. Settled in, showered, crawled into bed, backs facing one another, never touching, and slept.

Lucas awoke to an overwhelming desire to reunite with all those he left behind. It was consuming him. That night he had dreamed of Brooke, looking just the same as the day he left but hadn't said goodbye, dimples tucked into the corner of each cheek. His pretty girl, thrilled to see him again after all this time. His heart ached when he woke. Ached for the times when everything was simpler, ached for the times when he was happy. It had been so long since he had been happy.

Peyton was sitting at the table under the window when he opened his eyes, absent-minded doing something on her phone.

"What do you want to do today?" Peyton asked when she saw his eyes open.

Lucas sat up and blearily rubbed the sleep from his eyes, clearing his throat before he spoke. "I don't know. I guess go see Nathan and Haley."

"Don't you think it's rude, showing up unannounced after all this time?"

"Well I didn't come all this way to argue with you in a hotel room," he replied back. "I'm going to Nathan and Haley's. Come with me if you want, stay here if you don't." Without another word he removed himself from the bed and walked to the shower, standing under the hot beads and trying to shake off the nerves he felt at being back in Tree Hill after all this time.

OTHOTHOTH

Ella was not herself today. The normally happy and energetic child was lethargic and clingy and only wanted to be with her mother. Brooke was consumed with worry. They had been at Nathan and Haley's all day and no matter how much Jamie insisted, Ella had no interest in playing today. On a normal day she wouldn't give Brooke the time of day if Jamie was around. The children would be off playing on their own and wouldn't come downstairs until it was time for dinner. Today she was curled into Brooke's side, quiet and half asleep.

"Is she feeling okay?" Haley asked as she sat down on the couch with them.

Brooke placed her hand to her forehead and withdrew it in horror. "She's burning up a bit. I'm so worried."

Haley could read the anxiety on Brooke's face. "I'm sure she's fine. Probably just coming down with a bit of a bug."

Brooke rubbed circles into her daughter's back, pressed a kiss to her forehead and pulled her in closer. "It's okay baby," she reassured. "You're going to be okay."

Ella remained quiet, eyes falling in exhaustion.

"I think I'm going to go get her something," Brooke said. "Just run to the store and grab some Tylenol, something to break the fever."

"For sure. Just leave her here, no point in waking her up now that she's finally asleep."

"Are you sure?" Brooke asked. She didn't want to leave Ella when she wasn't feeling well but she didn't want to wake her either, she needed rest.

"Of course. I'll watch her."

Brooke nodded, hugged Haley, and headed out the door in worry.

Haley took Brooke's seat at Ella's head and pulled a strand of her dark blonde hair away from her face, looking in wonder at just how much Ella looked like Lucas when she slept. She loved Ella like her own daughter and hated that Lucas was missing out on her life. She knew that he would be an amazing father if he was given the chance.

The doorbell rang and Haley cursed, watching to make sure that it didn't wake Ella but the little girl was fast asleep. She rose from her spot and walked to the front door, sliding it open and staring in shock at the people before her. At first she wondered if they were real, if pregnancy hormones were making her hallucinate or if she had caught Ella's fever. But there was no denying the subtle way he held his hands in front of him in anxiousness, the way she looked shyly out from behind him. Hallucinations were not this vivid.

"Hi Hales," Lucas said when Haley refused to open her mouth, sheepish smile on his face.

She still said nothing but threw her arms open and embraced him, breathing in the scent of him that had not changed after all this time, still speechless with him in her arms.

"You're here?" She asked as if still uncertain.

"I hope that's okay," Lucas said unsurely.

"Of course it's okay! Come in!" She hugged Peyton briefly and ushered them inside, yelled for Nathan up the stairs, and stood in the foyer in disbelief.

Nathan's stunned expression was not unmissed as he took sight of them. "Luke? Peyton?"

"Hey Nate," Lucas said with a smile, relief washing over him as he took sight of his brother for the first time in too long.

Nathan laughed and hugged him, hugged Peyton, and led them to the living room.

"What are you guys doing here?" Haley asked.

Peyton and Lucas looked to each other, searching for an answer that neither one really had.

"It was just… time to come home." Lucas replied.

"For good?" Nathan asked.

Lucas shook his head. "I don't really have any plans either way."

Haley and Nathan nodded and watched as Lucas scanned the room until his eyes fell on the sleeping body on the couch.

"It that…" he started in disbelief. "Is she yours?"

In unison Haley and Nathan turned behind them to Ella sleeping, then locked eyes with each other in horror.

"Uh, no," Haley stated. "She's a friends. We actually have a son, Jamie. Nathan why don't you take them upstairs to meet him and I'll call Ella's mom."

Nathan understood the double meaning to Haley's words and nodded, beckoning Lucas and Peyton to follow him. As soon as they were out of earshot Haley pulled out her phone and dialled Brooke, praying that she wasn't on her way back already.

She answered on the fourth ring without a hello. "Is Ella okay?"

"She's fine, she's fine," Haley said. "But we have a much bigger problem."

"What?" Brooke asked with worry.

Haley hesitated. "Lucas is here."

Brooke's heart stopped. "What do you mean Lucas is there?"

"I mean he's here. In my house. With Peyton."

"Ella." It was all Brooke could think about, her daughter, her world, in a house with her father for the first time in her life and Brooke wasn't there to protect her. "I'm coming to get her right now."

"Brooke don't. If you come now Lucas will know that Ella is yours. Give me and hour and I'll bring her to you. You're not ready for this. None of us are ready for this. Give yourself a little bit of time to prepare. He thinks that Ella is a friends daughter, we will keep him away from her and as soon as I can slip away I will bring Ella home."

"Haley I need her." Brooke was on the verge of tears. Every one of her worst fears was coming true and she had absolutely no control over the situation.

"I know Brooke, but it's going to be okay, I promise. One hour and I'll have her back with you, okay?"

Brooke stifled the sobs threatening to choke her and mumbled a quick, "Okay," before hanging up the phone and racing home.

Haley had hung up just in time as Lucas, Peyton, Nathan and Jamie came back downstairs and into the living room.

"Is Ella better yet?" Jamie asked, running to the couch to check on his cousin.

"Not yet baby. Just let her sleep," Haley said, pulling Jamie away from her and sitting on the opposite couch. "So where have you been?"

Lucas cleared his throat. "I guess we have a lot of explaining to do."


	5. Chapter 5

She couldn't stop pacing. Anxiety had bunched itself up tight into her chest, her fists, her heart, every inch of her shaking in desperate fear. Brooke wanted to drive to Haley and Nathan's, scoop Ella into the safety of her arms, and never look back again. She couldn't believe the nerve of them, Lucas and Peyton, showing up unannounced after all this time. It had been one thing to walk out of all their lives without a goodbye, but showing up without warning five years later was a whole different kind of betrayal. Brooke sat on her couch and buried her face into her hands, desperately fighting off the threatening tears. She couldn't break down, not now. She had to stay strong for Ella.

Brooke heard her front door open and ran to front of the house in time to see Haley bring a bleary-eyed Ella inside. Brooke crossed the threshold in three long strides and enveloped Ella in her arms.

"Mommy," Ella exclaimed, wrapping her arms around her mother and burying her face in her neck.

"Hi, baby," Brooke said.

Brooke stood, Ella still in her arms, and faced Haley. "What happened?"

Haley sighed and ran her hands through her hair. "Let's sit down."

Haley followed her into the living room and took the seat next to hear, trying to wrap her mind around the drama unfolding around them.

"Why is he back?" Brooke asked, her voice strangled.

"He said it was just time to come home."

"After five years? Five years without a word and he just decides out of the blue one day to come back to Tree Hill?"

"I don't know, Brooke. Maybe it's something else. If it is he isn't saying."

"Did he say anything about Ella?"

Haley shook her head. "Just asked who she was. I said she was a friends' daughter and that I had to take her home, which is how I got out of there."

"Him and Peyton are still at your house?"

Haley nodded and sighed. "They're not staying with us. They said they have a hotel. And they're not sure how long they're staying for."

Brooke sighed. She couldn't believe this was happening. She had spent years dreaming of Lucas' return to her and the daughter he didn't know existed. Years wondering what it would be like if he had stayed and they had tried to make it work between them for Ella's sake. But now he was back in Tree Hill and Brooke was already longing for the simplicity of life without him again.

"What do I do, Haley?"

Haley wrapped her arms around Brooke's shoulders and pulled her in for a hug.

"Do you want to tell him?" Haley asked.

Brooke cleared her throat, hoping to clear her head with it. "He deserves to know. Ella deserves a father. But I really don't know if I'm ready to have him back in my life again. How selfish is that? And what if I tell him and he still doesn't want anything to do with her? Or me?"

"Brooke," Haley reasoned. "This is Lucas we're talking about. He may have been gone for five years but he is still the same man he was the day he left."

Brooke was quite sure that if she told Lucas that Ella was his daughter, that he would want to be in her life, that he would want to know her. But the uncertainty of it all was daunting.

"I'm so lost."

"I know, Tigger." Haley pulled her in for another hug and rubbed her arm. "It's all going to work out, somehow, someway. I have to get going back to the house but I'll come over tomorrow and hopefully you have a game plan by then. And if not then I'll help you work on it."

Brooke nodded, mumbled a quick, "Thanks," and walked Haley to the door, leaving Brooke and Ella alone.

The little girl crawled from the opposite couch to the one with her mother on it and curled herself into her side. Brooke wrapped her arm around her, curling a soft ringlet around her finger in circles and rested her head atop her daughters.

"Are you sad, Mommy?" Ella asked.

Brooked pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "No baby. I'm not sad. Are you?"

Ella shook her head. "No."

"Are you sad that you don't have a daddy?" Brooke asked.

Ella's little face craned upwards to meet her mothers. "I have a daddy," she stated matter-of-factly.

"I'm talking about a real one. Like Jamie and Uncle Nathan. And like Jenny and Jake."

"Jake is my daddy too." Her lower lip pouted out, dimples exaggerated in innate stubbornness.

"Ella you know that Jake isn't your real daddy," Brooke offered gently and carefully. She was thrilled that Ella had a father figure in her life and overjoyed that it was a man as decent as Jake, but she never wanted her daughter to be denied her true parentage.

'It's okay Mommy. I don't need a real daddy. I got Jake. And I got you." She raised her tiny hand to Brooke's face and bopped her on the nose with her index finger. When a couple tears rolled down her face at her daughters sentiment, Ella gently wiped them away.

"And I got you too," Brooke replied, pulling Ella in closer. "How about a movie night? Should I call Jake and Jenny?"

A smile broke out on Ella's face, clearly starting to feel better. "Yes please!"

"Okay. You go pick out a movie and I'll go call them."

Ella bounded off the couch and just as Brooke was beginning the search for her phone, someone knocked on the door. Fear gripped her. She knew the likelihood of Lucas showing up on her door was slim to none but the concern was there nonetheless. She peered through the peephole and relief washed over her.

"I was just about to call you," she said without a hello.

"No need. Haley did it for you. She thought you might need some company," Jake said.

Brooke nodded. "She was right."

Jake stepped forward and enveloped Brooke in a hug, gently rubbing her back. "You're going to be okay. You're tough. And me and Jenny are here to help."

Brooke took a deep breath and opened the door wider for them to come in, kissed Jenny on the cheek, and walked to the living room where Ella had movies sprawled all over the floor.

"I picked this one," she said, holding a DVD high above her head.

"I love that one," Jenny said, taking a spot next to Ella on the floor to admire her choices while Brooke and Jake took a seat on the couch.

"Where's your head at, girly?" Jake asked.

Brooke flashed him a reassuring smile and took his hand. "If you don't mind, tonight I just kind of want to be distracted."

Jake grinned and gave her a wink. "Lucky for you, the three of us are great at being a distraction."

Ella stood from her spot on the floor and proclaimed that the movies was ready and it was time for everyone to be quiet.

"Can you play with my hair, Brooke?" Jenny asked as she usually did during movie hour.

"Of course," Brooke replied.

Jenny took her usual spot at Brooke's feet so she could do her hair.

"I want to sit with Daddy!" Ella cried.

Brooke and Jake shot each other a look. It was not unusual for Ella to call Jake 'daddy'. Mostly when she was tired or sick or scared or feeling particularly cuddly. Jake didn't mind. He loved having another little girl in his life that he got the privilege of being a father to. He opened his arms to her and she crawled in, nuzzling herself into his embrace, head on his chest, warm in his lap, and the family settled in for the movie.

Both girls were fast asleep before the end. As with most nights they brought the girls to Ella's room, tucked them in to bed and changed into their own pyjamas, then headed back downstairs for some adult time before they went to bed. As they settled onto the couch and put on a less child friendly movie, another knock sounded on the door.

It wasn't late, just before ten, just unusual.

"I'll get it," Jake said. He paused the tv and walked to the door, Brooke following closely behind in her small sleeping shorts and a tank top, Jake in his boxers and a tshirt.

He pulled open the door and felt his heart fall to his knees. Lucas and Peyton stood on the threshold, eyes confused, faces alight with promise.

"Jake?" It was Peyton that spoke first, her voice so full and familiar.

Brooke stepped aside to get a good look at them both and was astounded at how little neither of them had changed. Lucas' hair was short, the way she liked it, and Peyton was still just as skinny as ever. Their faces both held a look of regret.

"What are you doing here?" It was all Brooke could manage.

Neither answered her question.

"You two are together?" Peyton asked. The distain in her voice was palpable.

Lucas had eyes for no one but Brooke. He couldn't stop breathing her in. With her standing before him for the first time in far too long, he couldn't help but wonder why he had ever left.

"Hi," Jake managed, the first polite word any of them had come up with. He opened his mouth to speak again but was interrupted by the pattering of little feet on the stairs behind them. Tiny feet padded their way down the hardwood steps to the foyer where the bright eyed little girl hugged the leg of the man in front of her, and with three words turned Lucas and Peyton's realities sideways.

"Daddy, I'm thirsty."


	6. Chapter 6

Jake gazed down to the bright eyed little girl at his feet, heart pounding, and scooped her into his arms.

"You should be asleep, Ella," Jake said, pressing a kiss to the top of her hair. She placed her head against his shoulder as her eyes found the visitors at her door.

"I know you," she said, her eyes finding Lucas.

Lucas stared into his daughters face, breathing in her blue eyes and dark blonde hair, a visible dimple tucked into the corner of her cheek. She looked like her mother but there was a hint of genetics that didn't belong to her, too.

"I know you, too," Lucas replied with a smile, his heart warming at her little face. "Haley didn't tell me that she was yours," he said to Brooke, gesturing to Ella in Jake's arms. "She was at their house earlier. Why wouldn't she just tell me she was your daughter?"

"Maybe because it's none of your business," Brooke snapped. "You have no right to walk back into our lives and start questioning the way things turned out in your absence."

Lucas wanted to drop his eyes in shame but he found himself staring again at Ella, drawn to her, studying her delicate features and subtle beauty. The way her little hand curled into a ball and rested on Jake's chest, the way her feathery eyelashes fluttered open and shut as she studied them; Lucas was mesmerized by it all.

"Where's Jenny?" Peyton asked Jake, barely looking at Brooke.

"Sleeping upstairs," Brooke replied defensively. She wasn't letting Lucas anywhere near Ella, but she definitely wasn't letting Peyton anywhere near Jenny either.

"Can I see her?" Peyton asked. "She must be so big now."

"It's not really a good time, Peyton," Jake said. "It's late. The girls should be sleeping."

Peyton nodded in understanding but the disappointment was easy to read on her face. "Right. Of course."

"Why are you here?" Brooke asked. She tried to keep her voice firm and full of confidence but the anxiety in her tone was palpable. "Why now, after all this time?"

Lucas' eyes found hers, silently begging her to understand that he just couldn't be away anymore, couldn't pretend to be living any longer, couldn't be away from her, from them all, for another minute. Silently begging her to forgive him even though he knew he didn't deserve it.

But all that came out in words was, "It was time to come home."

Brooke sighed. It was not the answer she had been hoping for.

"Can we get together? I know that now probably isn't the best time but I want to talk. I want to know how your life has turned out. Obviously pretty well if you've got this amazing little girl," Lucas said and reached out to place a hand on Ella's arm. Brooke cringed. "But I want to give you the explanation that you deserve, and the apology that I've owed you for much too long."

It was as if Jake and Peyton didn't even exist. Lucas' words were for Brooke only, his eyes never leaving her. He didn't care if him and Peyton were technically still together, it was Brooke that he came back here for and Peyton was blind if she missed that.

Worry seized her. She wanted to tell Lucas on the spot that Ella was his daughter, wanted to give him the biggest reason of all why his leaving was a terrible idea. But she wanted to tell him alone and when the time was right. Not now while their daughter was in the arms of another man she called daddy.

"Are you coming over to play?" Ella asked, raising her head to get a better look at Lucas.

Lucas gazed at Ella in wonder. He wanted to know everything about the little girl. She was Brooke's daughter, all the best pieces of her in another human being, and Lucas longed to know her.

"I hope so. But it's up to your Mommy." He pulled the guilt card.

"Can he come play, Mommy?" Ella asked.

"Not now, baby," Brooke said, pulling Ella from Jake's arms and into her own. "You're supposed to be sleeping. And Lucas and Peyton have to go home." She not so subtly dropped the hint.

Lucas nodded. "But I hope I'll get to see you soon, Ella."

Brooke fought to get control of her quivering bottom lip, aching for Lucas to know the truth, wanting more than anything to relieve herself of the burden she'd been carrying since the moment she found out she was pregnant.

Ella nodded in excitement.

"Are you free tomorrow?" Lucas asked. "Both of you?" He acknowledged Jake for the first time.

Brooke and Jake looked to each other for an answer neither had.

"I don't know. Maybe," Brooke settled on.

"I'm sorry, Brooke. I really am. And I know that you're mad at us, and you have every right to be. But I hope that you'll give me a chance to explain."

He had always been so good with words; Brooke felt her resolve softening already.

"I'll think about it," she said.

"That's all I'm asking," Lucas replied. "Goodnight. I'll see you soon." His voice held a world of promise.

Jake and Brooke stood on the threshold of the door and watching Lucas and Peyton walk away for the second time, not knowing if it would be as permanent as the first, wanting to believe that this time they had a shot at being in each other's lives, too afraid to consider the alternative. Jake shut the door and turned to her, eyes alight with worry, and wrapped her and Ella into the safety and security of his arms.

"You did good, girly."

Brooke inhaled and extracted herself from Jake's arms, finding strength in the little girl curled into her embrace.

"Let's get you some water and get you back to bed, Ella," she said, carrying her daughter into the kitchen. Broke and Jake tucked Ella back into bed and settled in for a night neither of them would sleep through.

The next morning dawned bright and early with a ringing phone, shrill in the stillness of the quiet house. Brooke groaned and cursed whoever was calling her, rolled over to answer but the ringing stopped as her fingertips found the phone.

"Mommy, it's Auntie Haley!" Ella cried, bounding into the room full of energy, phone in her hand.

"Thanks, baby," Brooke replied, taking the phone from her daughter and pulling the little girl into bed with her.

"Get up, Tigger. You're coming over," Haley's voice said through the receiver.

"I really don't think I'm up for anything today, Haley. I just kind of want a quiet day at home with Jake and the girls," Brooke reasoned.

"Look, Lucas told me that he came by your house last night. He bombarded me with questions about Ella and Jake and how the two of you ended up together. I didn't tell me him anything, but him and Peyton are not going anywhere anytime soon by the sounds of it. They're coming over for lunch. I suggest that you get your butt over here too. Meet on common ground. What you tell him is entirely up to you, but at least here you have other people to be a buffer."

Brooke felt completely ill prepared to tell Lucas about the secret she had been keeping for close to five years. In all selfishness she was afraid of losing Ella, having had her to herself for so long. She worried that Lucas would try to take her away, take her back to wherever he had made a life for himself and cut her out of Ella's life.

"Okay," Brooke conceded. "I can't guarantee that I'm ready to tell him anything, but I'll come."

Brooke could hear Haley's smile through the phone. "I'm here for you, Brooke. Nathan and I will support you whatever you choose to do. Just be here for twelve."

Twelve o'clock came much too fast and before Brooke knew it her and Ella and Jenny had found themselves at Nathan and Haley's, sitting awkwardly around the living room in silence. Brooke wished that Jake hadn't had to go into work on short notice; she missed the comfort and stability he brought her.

"So you've been in New York then?" Haley asked Lucas and Peyton, sitting on the loveseat not touching.

"Yeah. We have an apartment just outside of Manhattan. The city is great," Peyton boasted.

A silent nod went awkwardly around the room, silence heavy until Ella came walking in, hand in hand with Jenny.

"Brooke," Jenny said, her voice quiet and worried.

"Yeah, sweetie?" Brooke asked, pushing forward from the couch to reach her girls.

"Ella says her heart hurts again."

Brooke stopped breathing. She was praying that this moment would never happen again, that the fear and anxiety she was feeling were all for naught. But one glance at her daughter told Brooke that her fears were not unnecessary. Ella was pale, a faint sweat forming across the top of her brow, hand shaking so badly Jenny's arm trembled.

"Baby," Brooke soothed, reached out a hand and cupping Ella's cheek in her palm.

Ella's eyes were glassy and bright.

"Haley," Brooke whispered, trying to keep her voice calm and level for Ella's sake, to not scare her child more than she already was. "Call an ambulance."

Haley had been through this before. She understood what was happening. She rushed from her spot on the couch and grabbed the phone, quickly dialling 911 and muttering into the receiver just as Ella collapsed onto the floor.

"Ella!" Brooke cried, throwing herself down onto the floor next to her daughter. "Come on baby, not again."

The volume on the phone was loud enough that the operators voice rang throughout the room asking, "Do you know what's wrong?"

Haley's eyes found Lucas, crouched with worry next to Brooke, his hands on either side of Ella's head stabilizing her. Haley didn't have time to worry about the consequences of what she was about to say, didn't have time to worry about the implications of revealing this piece of information if it meant saving Ella's life.

"Yes." Haley said. Lucas' eyes connected with hers, worry etched into every line of his face. "She has HCM."

Lucas felt his own heart stop next to his daughters.


	7. Chapter 7

There was an eerie stillness that had settled, heavy and languid in the air. Abundantly clear to those breathing it in, seated in their plastic chairs in a square, waiting for news. No one dared to speak because to speak was to break the common agreement that everything was fine; to speak was to be the voice of reason, of logic, that said that not everything might work out in their favour. And no one dared to be that one. Brooke held Jake's hand tight in her own, squeezing every ounce of fear and anxiety out of her fingertips and into his, sharing her burden with him. His thumb stroked soft lines across the back of her hand, reassuring her in a way that no words could.

Nathan had stayed with Jenny and Jamie, comforting them with hollow words that everything would be fine. Haley, Peyton and Lucas had driven Brooke, Lucas' eyes burning with questions that he didn't dare ask for the moment, his mind reeling with possibilities.

The implications of the moment were so profound that Brooke could hardly stand it. She hated waiting; waiting for someone else to tell her the fate of her daughter. It was her job to protect Ella as a mother and relinquishing control and handing Ella's fate over to someone else was killing her.

"I need a coffee," she stated simply, releasing Jake's hand from her own and standing for the first time in hours. Her body was stiff with fear and immobility.

"I'll come with you," Jake offered, pushing himself from the seat next to her.

"Could you stay?" she pleaded, her voice quiet and begging. "I need you here in case the doctor comes back. Please."

Jake nodded understandingly. "Of course. Are you sure you're okay by yourself though?"

Brooke nodded, hoping it would be more convincing than opening her mouth and giving away her vulnerability with her words. "Just call me if you hear anything."

Jake nodded. Brooke pressed a hand to her lips and turned from them, hoping to hide the tears that were welling up in her eyes and walked down the hall on her left, not caring if it led to the cafeteria, not caring if it led anywhere. She needed a moment to break down, a moment to not be strong and invincible. A moment to grieve for the times she was powerless to protect Ella.

She ran. Down the closest hall and another, not caring where until at last she came to a spot at a dead end, pressed her forehead against the cool glass of the window and cried. Cried for her daughter, scared and in pain away from her, cried for Lucas, left out of the life of his child, cried for herself and the helplessness she felt.

"Brooke."

She spun from the window at his voice, so full and familiar and comforting with the way her name sounded coming from his lips. She didn't reply, just gazed into his face and fought the longing that had taken her by surprise.

"Ella?" She gasped.

"No news," Lucas said quickly, taking a step towards her and swallowing. She looked so beautiful. Even with her hair in loose messy waves from running her fingers through it, her eyes glassy with tears, she was still his Pretty Girl even after all these years.

She crossed her arms over her chest and placed her fingertips on her lips, coaxing the words from her mouth. "Why did you leave?" It was a whisper, filled with the years of rejection and betrayal she had faced in his absence.

"Brooke," he whispered back, taking another step towards her. "I'm so sorry."

"That's not an answer, Lucas!"

He shook his head, trying to justify a decision he had never felt was right in his heart. "Ella has HCM." It was a statement filled with questions.

Brooke broke down further, sobbing into the palm of her hand, shielding her face from him, hoping to keep her secret for just a moment longer. But he stepped further towards her and wrapped her shaking body into his long arms, hoping to coax the secret from her.

"No," she cried, pushing his body away from hers, refusing to fall back into him so quickly. "Lucas, don't."

But he didn't give in, didn't let her push him away. Simply held her at arms length and tilted her chin so their eyes met.

"Brooke," he pleaded. "Ella has HCM." He needed to know. Since the moment Haley had first said it it had been consuming him, his mind racing over every possibility.

"You shouldn't have left."

"Why, Brooke? Why?"

She pulled herself together long enough to stare at him, his arms still on either of hers, and gazed into the eyes her daughter had inherited. She saw so much of Ella in him in that moment. She took a deep breath and readied herself to part with the secret she had once tried to share. The secret that had changed every last little thing in her life to something so much better.

"Because then you would have known your daughter."

There was such a resolute assuredness in her voice that he dropped his arms from hers, falling to his side in the same way his heart had just fallen into his stomach. He couldn't believe what she was saying but yet, in his heart, he knew she was telling the truth. He could see it in the way Ella's eyes met his, blue on blue.

"My daughter?"

Brooke stayed silent, watching him absorb the revelation.

"Ella is mine? But Jake…?"

Brooke shook her head. "Jake and I became friends after Ella was born."

"She calls him Daddy." His mind was reeling circles. He wanted it to be true, wanted Ella to be his, but was terrified and ashamed that if it was, he had already missed out on so much.

"She never had a dad. Jake was there."

Guilt choked him. He ran his fingers through his hair and turned away from her, pacing the length of the hall. He had a daughter. A five year old daughter. And her mother was Brooke. His Pretty Girl. All the dreams he had had of starting a life with her, a family, and he had, he just wasn't around to be a part of it.

"Ella's my daughter?" He asked, turning back to her.

"I found out a couple of weeks after you left. I tried to find you, to tell you. But I couldn't track you down. It was like you disappeared and left behind this huge part of yourself with me." Brooke was candid. She didn't feel as if she could be anything else with him staring into her face with their daughters eyes.

He stood stock still, absorbing this life changing piece of information. "Brooke," he cried, taking three long strides towards her and enveloping her in his arms. "I'm so sorry. What have I done?"

She momentarily thought of pushing him away but felt as though he had lost enough today. So instead she wrapped her arms around his back, revelling in the familiarity of it, as one of his hands found the cradle of her head, the other the on her back.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered into her hair, pressing himself against her. "I never would have left if I had known."

"I know," Brooke replied.

"I have a daughter."

Brooke wondered how many more times he would have to say it before he believed it. She pushed herself away from him, uncomfortable in their closeness and the happiness she felt at it.

"Her HCM?" He asked. "How bad is it?"

"This is the second episode. She takes medication and she lives a normal, happy life. She can play with Jenny and Jamie and be like every other little girl. She hasn't had an episode in almost two years." Brooke felt the tears welling back into her eyes.

"I can't believe I gave it to her."

The guilt was easy to read on his face. "It's not your fault, Luke."

His eyes met hers, blazing in a fire of passion and buried desire. Brooke knew that look. And with no hesitation he did exactly what she expected him to do: closed the small gap between them pressed his lips to hers in a kiss that took her breath away. His hands found either side of her face, gently bringing her closer to him as the kiss deepened, opening a longing so deep that Brooke hadn't felt since their last time together. She pulled away first, placed one hand on her stomach and the other on her mouth.

"Luke." Her voice was low and heavy with desire. "You can't do that."

"I know."

From the depths of her pocket a ring cried out. With shaking hands she pulled it from her coat.

"Jake?"

"The doctor has news."

Brooke hung up and glanced at Lucas.

"Ella?" He asked, his concern increasing tenfold.

"We have to go," she replied, turning to face the hall and slipping her hand into his as they walked back to their daughters fate.


	8. Chapter 8

She stroked her thumb across the soft cheek, warm and blushed with heat. The smooth skin beneath her hand was so familiar, so comforting, that Brooke instantly felt herself relax at being back with Ella, sleeping softly in the hospital bed. She was quiet, pulled under by a haze of medicine mixed to sedate her, to allow time for her tired heart to mend. Brooke longed to see her dark lashes flutter open and to gaze into the light eyes Lucas had given her. But they remained stubbornly shut, the only sign of her life a thready beep that sounded with every pump of her little heart.

Brooke placed her forehead against Ella's side, revelling in the warmth that radiated from her, breathing in this moment of peace and assuredness that Ella was, for the moment, alright. The doctor had allowed only family in for the time being, and while Brooke had tried to insist that they were all family, that everyone in that room was Ella's family, they had only allowed her in for the first hour. And while at first it felt selfish, Brooke was grateful for the time she and Ella had alone.

But then she began to ache. She ached for Lucas. She ached for Jake. Both good men at heart, both Ella's fathers in their own ways. She wanted them both in the room with her. Jake the father Ella had always known, the father she loved. Lucas the father who gave her life, the stranger she had been deprived of. Brooke felt trapped. She wanted support, wanted someone in the room with her to voice her worries, someone who cared as much for Ella as she did. And while the doctors had assured her that Ella was going to make a full recovery, the fact that Brooke had almost lost her daughter again weighed heavy in her heart and mind.

Almost as if he knew, the door creaked open and a concerned face peered from behind. "How's our girl?" Jake asked.

Brooke smiled, relief and gratitude washing over her. "Still sleeping. The doctors say she'll be out until the meds wear off."

Jake stepped into the room, quietly closing the door behind him and walked to the chair next to Brooke, sitting down and enveloping her in a tight hug. "She's a fighter," he whispered into her hair.

She managed a quiet nod against his shoulder instead of words.

"How are you?" he asked.

"I told Lucas."

Jake faltered, confusion puckering itself between his brows. "About Ella?" His voice was gentle but concerned.

Another nod. "He figured it out, with the HCM. I had to tell him."

Jake took her hand in his. "How did he take it?"

She couldn't help the small smile that reached her features. "He was happy, Jake. He seemed really happy."

Jake's genuine smile set her heart at ease. "It must be quite the relief for you, telling him after all this time. I'm happy for you, Brooke."

"Lucas will never replace you, Jake. You're still Ella's father."

A sad smile tugged the corners of his lips somewhere between a smile and a frown. "I'm not, though. At the end of the day Lucas is Ella's father. And if he's willing to be in her life then I won't stand in his way. I adore Ella and I always want to have a place in her life, in your life, but if she has Lucas then I can't be her dad anymore."

"Jake." Her heart was breaking. Ella had gained one father and lost another.

"This doesn't change anything, Brooke." He squeezed her hand tighter in his. "I still love Ella, and I still love you."

He wiped the tear that ran down her cheek. "We love you, Jake. And even if Lucas stays, if he wants a place in Ella's life, you will always, not matter what, be a dad to her. And Jenny will always be my baby, too. I would never take that away from our girls."

Jake wrapped Brooke back into his embrace. "I'll leave you and Ella alone, I just came to tell you that I'm going to head back to the house and relieve Nathan. Jenny's probably a wreck."

Brooke nodded and pulled away. "Give her a kiss for me. I'll call you if anything changes."

He placed a kiss on the dimple of her left cheek, rose and hovered over Ella's sleeping form. Bending down, Jake pressed his lips against the gap between her eyebrows, worry consuming him, and whispered, "Love you little girl," into the depths of her hair, pulled away and left the room with a smile.

Brooke felt his absence like a weight in her chest, like a piece of her had just walked away. She knew that Jake would always be there for her and Ella but she couldn't shake the feeling that somehow she had just lost him. Her muscles were tight with tension and worry and she stood to stretch, arching her back to rid herself of the ache that had settled into her.

Quietly turning from the room, Brooke walked into the hall and closed the door behind her, walking the short distance to the waiting room. They all looked exhausted, eyes leaden with sleep, bodies slumped in the uncomfortable chairs.

"You guys didn't need to wait. She's not waking up any time soon."

Haley pushed herself straight in the chair. "We know Ella is going to be okay. We wanted to wait and see how you were."

Brooke smiled, gratitude washing over her. "I'm fine. You should all head home, really. I think I'm just going to spend the night here."

"Are you sure?" Haley asked. "I don't want to leave you alone."

"Go," Brooke said, playfully swatting at her friend. "You have a husband and a kid of your own to go take care of. I'm fine, Ella's fine. Go take care of yourself."

Haley smiled ruefully. "I'll give you guys a ride to your hotel," she addressed Lucas and Peyton.

"Actually," Lucas said as Peyton stood to leave. "I think I might stay, if that's okay?" He looked to Brooke for approval.

"Well if you stay then I'll stay too," Peyton announced, looping her arm through Lucas' as a show of unity that he shook off.

"You should go, get some rest," he convinced her. She gave him a look that said so much more than his words. "You should go." He phrased it gently as if he was concerned for her but the intonation of indifference wasn't easy to miss.

Peyton didn't feel like arguing in front of the people they used to call their friends. Didn't want to show them how much her relationship with Lucas had fallen apart over the years; how they had sacrificed all their friends and family for a life together that hadn't worked out.

"I'll see you in the morning," she said instead of all the things she wished to say. Stood in front of him and pressed a kiss to his lips, not as an act of affection, but as a show of possession, marking what was hers.

Brooke involuntarily cringed. Haley and Peyton waved goodbye and left Lucas alone with Brooke. Her heartbeat quickened against her will.

"I'm okay, really," she said, not wanting him to feel obliged to stay but grateful he had nonetheless.

"I was actually hoping that I would get to meet my daughter."

Her heart fluttered at the words. She had waited to long to hear them leave his lips. "This isn't how I wanted you to meet."

He shook his head. "Me neither. But I've missed enough of her life. I won't miss another minute."

Brooke tried not to let herself think too much into the repercussions of his statement and instead reached her hand out to his, guiding him down the hall where their daughter awaited. She watched his face as they entered, eyes alight with curiosity and worry, beguiled and transfixed by the little girl asleep in the bed. She guided him to the chair and they sat, side by side, sentinel at Ella's bed.

"She looks like you," he whispered, his eyes never leaving her face. "I can't believe I missed it before when she was at Nathan and Haley's."

"She got her eyes from you. And her way with words. She gives the most reasonable excuses for things I've ever heard from a child." She couldn't keep the pride from her voice.

Lucas glanced at Brooke, her eyes alive in talking about her daughter. Their daughter.

"I can't get over the fact that she's mine. I always dreamed of starting a life with you, Brooke. I just never thought that I wouldn't be around to be in it." The guilt choked him so much the sentence barely left his lips.

"You didn't know, Luke. I know you would have stayed if you had."

"The thing that kills me the most is that I know how much happier I would have been here with you, with her. I'm not happy, Brooke. It's why I came home. I just wish I had done it so much sooner."

She reached out a shaking hand and placed it on the warmth of his knee. "You're home now, you know about Ella now. That's all that matters."

He shook his head. "You can't forgive me that easily. It can't be that easy for you."

"It isn't," she admitted. "So much of me hates you for being so selfish and leaving. Leaving without a goodbye. But I can't be selfish. I have Ella. And if you want to be in her life then I need to be selfless and put her needs first, not mine."

Lucas was astounded by how much motherhood had changed her, his Pretty Girl. Thriving and blossoming into an incredible and loving mother. And he had missed it all.

"Can I touch her?" He asked, hesitant and unsure. "I don't know…"

Brooke nodded, taking her hand from his knee and placing his palm in hers, gently bringing his hand from their sides to the edge of the bed. With a gentle squeeze of reassurance she placed Lucas' hand on top of Ella's and released hers.

His hand remained motionless, scared and shaky. Slowly he cupped his fingers beneath the curve of Ella's palm, flipping his hand over so her little hand rested in his own. With a gentle motion he stroked his thumb over the soft, pale skin, touching his child for the first time in their lives.

With a breath of life Ella's eyes opened, heavy and slow with medicated sleep, batting a few times before opening fully and coming to a rest on her mother's face. Lucas held her hand tighter as Brooke sighed in relief.

"Hi baby," she said, unable to fight the tears the sprung from her eyes. She left her chair and sat on the edge of Ella's bed, stroking the hair away from her child's face.

"Mommy?" It was a question filled with uncertainty.

"I'm right here, Ella." She pressed a kiss between her eyes and Ella relaxed at her proximity.

"Mommy," Ella said again, her tone inflicted with a question. "Where's Daddy?"

Brooke's eyes found Lucas' quickly and it broke her heart to see the tears that sprung to them, breaking her own heart with his.


End file.
